Consent

No

I refuse to believe that I am just an empty vessel

An empty ship to adolescent ecstasy

Void of reason

Just an attic packed tight in fear

No’s bouncing between the soundproof walls.

I refuse to believe that my X’s are my own enemy

Instead I see my gene’s unzipped

as I feel your pulse beat through my skins

with each gentle animalistic gasp

I feel my bones screaming

No

But my tears are lost in the sweat of your determined brow

My mind tries to leave

Just as I had been earlier

But your filth-stained hands bring me back to the thrashing shore

I still feel my bones screaming

No

The Chase

Addicted to the chase

like an atmospheric race

blinded by curiosity and lust

with emotions soon to rust

my heart its own free spirit

its targets soon shall fear it

please do not try

I’m only seeking for the high

I cannot let my feelings hide

though my soul runs far and wide

but soon my feelings shall follow

and my chest will soon be hollow

Awakening

 One short breath

            BLIND

Alone in a technicolor world

searching for something to call my own

empty promises and forgetful lies

stumbling across old scars everytime

a dreamer in a burning hell

colors bleeding from my shell

time to sleep in personal meth

like screaming in a silent death

people far, people near

doesn’t matter if they can’t hear

one last heart string forever mine

grey emptiness without a life

every try, every hope

fears for tears

lies for eyes

I am blind to colors

as You are blind to me

but I am the only one who will see. 

 

 

                          COPE

“Do you ever want to disappear?”

To run your fingers through warm grass

To drink the sweetest poisons

To let the sunshine burn deep in your throat

When life gets too fast

And your chest beats out of time

                               The walls close in around you          

                                           And nothing

Nothing

Feels as good as the high

 You so self-indulgently get

As the diluted pain

Goes down the rusting shower drain.

“Do you ever want to disappear?”

 

FORGOTTEN

Your tongue cuts like ice

Your laughter blares like horns

Blossoms opened like summertime

and your smells filled my night

Every kiss like a sweet crime

nothing had ever been this right.

But

you’ve taken a different road

leaving me in the dust

and now I bear the load

of the heart you left to rust.

Heaven

Give me a Friday night

music pumping in our veins

pressed together

swaying our hips

to the synthesized beats

your hands like a lighthouse

guiding me

to the safety in the sweat of our youth

spin me around

I will swim in your eyes

only moments before

our lips speak for themselves

their own hormonal language

we’ve lost control

and as we fight for air

between stolen kisses

we float above

high

untouched

 

EXPECTATIONS

Infinite melodic lies

that burning blue fire in your eyes

anger and hate is like the smell of burning flesh

the hell of the same old loneliness

black thunderclouds follow me

like the shadow of the person I could be.